When is it my turn?

I know, I know… January. 2015 will be my year. I know it. I say it every day- it is out there in the universe (Right Aliza?), but I have to vent.

I believe I am a good friend, heck great friend. I am always reaching out whether it be text, facebook, snail mail, etc…I always try to stay in touch with my friends. I always send goodies to all of their babies on holidays and birthdays. I don’t let what I am going through stop me from doing that.

I have helped and supported quite a few friends through this infertility process. While I am so happy and excited for all of my friends who do get pregnant, why not me? Why do I have to keep sitting back and watching all the bump pictures and maternity photos and newborn pictures? When is it my turn?

I am a very sensitive person and take everything to heart (ask my mother lol) and I am very hurt I was the go to person for many friends through this process then I stopped hearing from them when they got pregnant. Now I know it is hard for them- trust me I know- to not feel guilty talking to me and seeing me, but it is also not fair to me that they drop off the planet. I was telling Dave, my husband, how I just stop hearing from some people when they get their positive test and he agreed with me- it just sucks. Just frustrating all around.

All I have to say is, be there for a friend who is struggling. When a good friend of mine was suffering through post-partum depression, I went and worked at her house one day, I always reached out, texted,  brought food over, cuddled her baby up so she could shower and take a breath, you name it to make sure she was ok. I was going through my battle and I want a baby myself, but I stepped up.  (and vice versa- she brought me a plate of superwoman cookies when I needed it!) Don’t forget about your friends who helped you through this. Continue to reach out and check on them. They helped you through your nightmare, don’t forget about theirs.

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