Hope & Heartache

October 2011- Dave and I start trying for a baby…I’m excited, nervous and ready for the journey.

December 2011- My parents sold our home we have lived in since I was 10, split up and moved into their own places. Probably one of the hardest months of my life.

January/February 2012- My Crohn’s starts acting up- I had to get back on steroids, get a endoscopy, colonoscopy, and MRI.

March 2012- Ok, back on track to continue trying for a baby. The last 3 months pretty much meant nothing because I was so stressed and sick.

July 2012- Hm, something is not right. I decide to go for an ultrasound on myself to see what is going on while Dave thinks I am rushing and that we should wait a few more months. I felt at this point- we are both young, we are in good shape, why is this not happening? So I go for the ultrasound and the technician did not see anything wrong and even thought I possibly ovulated later then I thought I was. So I started to buy ovulation kits to track everything.

August 2012- After my annual appointment with my doctor, she suggested an infertility specialist that Dave and I could see so we could possibly get more answers and have Dave checked out.  We went through the ringer here- blood work on top of blood work (one day they took 18 viles on me and 13 on Dave), samples of everything imaginable, ultrasounds, urologist appointment for Dave and the beginning of acupuncture for me.

September 2012- My husband Dave would like to keep some results personal and between us and my family, but we after tests we did find some issues out on Dave’s end. We trusted our doctor when he said flat out- you will not get pregnant on your own and there are no options to help Dave’s issues. IVF is your only option.

October 2012- Before we started process for IVF, I had to go in for a Hysterosalpingogram (say that 3 times fast). It is basically where they go through your uterus and fallopian tubes with a catheter and spray saline to see if anything is blocked. I cannot tell you how much it hurt when they did this- to the point I almost fainted and the doctor had to shove alcohol swabs up my nose. As we were looking on the monitor at this findings he pointed to my uterus and said “See this? This should not be there. ” I freaked out…what are you talking about? The doctor found a polyp blocking my uterus. (Side note: Superstorm Sandy blew into the Jersey shore at the end of October and crushed our hometown. We were out of power for a week and had to go down to a hotel in Delaware with the dog to be able to work…because we didn’t have enough going on.)

November 2012- A few days after Thanksgiving, I was in the hospital waiting room at 6am with my parents and husband waiting to get a polyp removed from my uterus. The polyp looked massive on the screen, that day in October and the doctor said was blocking any sperm that would have gotten there. I felt like the last year was a waste and this could have been found so much sooner. It was extremely frustrating but at the same time gave me peace that we possibly found the last problem on this road for a baby.

December 2012- my parents are officially back together 🙂 Dave and I had our big appointment with the doctor to discuss starting IVF…we were so optimistic and excited! We decided on in vitro fertilization with ICSI. ICSI is where after they collect my eggs, they put Dave’s sperm directly into my egg and monitor it for 3-5 days as it becomes an embryo. Our insurance covered NONE of this. Not one dime. We were so blessed to have my parents and Dave’s parents pretty much chip in and split the bill. (Over $14,000.00). This was before the medicine we had to order- shots, pills, you name it– that eventually would be over $3,000- out of our pocket.

January 2012- Looking back now, I am kicking myself for rushing to IVF. We didn’t try to find medicine or natural pills for Dave. We didn’t change our diets. We didn’t get a second opinion or look at any other options. We just jumped right in and truly thought it was going to work.

Wow you got this far? Thanks for reading 🙂 I will continue my story another night…this is as far as I can go right now.


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